We can all agree that the last year and a half has been a challenge, to say the least. Whether your work situation changed, your home life shifted, or your relationships were impacted, many of us did not make it into the new year without significant (maybe even shocking) changes to our lives.

While some adjustments might have been welcomed, others might have been a little more complex, leaving you feeling slightly exhausted and bruised from all the sudden alterations.

I know the feeling. At the beginning of the pandemic, I was juggling 3 jobs, a social life, a new marriage, health issues, selling our first home, and moving into a farm – all at the same time! I forgot to slow down and take time for myself. My mental health suffered because my coping skills were simply no match for the massive changes occurring and I was postponing my health in exchange for things that were not as important but perhaps more urgent or stressful at the time.

When our survival instincts (fight or flight) kick in, dealing with our given stressor becomes the highest priority while everything else becomes secondary, including our health. When we suffer, we aren’t truly able to give our best to the people and things we care about the most.

Not to mention, all of this is exacerbated if you are like me and struggle with chronic anxiety and depression.

So what is the solution? Making time for yourself.

If you don’t make time for your wellness, you will be forced to make time for your illness.

Why is Self-Care Critical to Our Overall Health?

Although it’s easier said than done, integrating self-care practices is at the core of a healthy lifestyle.

But the reality is, we live in a tough world and it’s hard not to think about all the things you “need” to be doing, or “should” be doing all the time. If you’re a highly sensitive person, a student, a people-pleaser, a go-getter, a working parent, a stay-at-home parent, a career person, a dog mom, or anyone who sacrifices their time for other people or things, you’ve probably experienced what it’s like to feel deprived or worn down. This can affect your mood, your energy levels, and your confidence.

That’s why a connection to self is so important.

One way we do that is to have an honest discussion with ourselves on how we can practice self-care and listen to what our body is telling us. When we feel taken care of, we can put that love and energy back into the world for others to receive.

We are not on our journey to save the world but to save ourselves. But in doing that, you save the world. The influence of a vital person vitalizes.

Joseph Campbell

Here are the 6 types of self-care you can implement in your life right now that I hope helped you as much as they helped me:

1. journal

There is something about getting your words out on paper that can actually make you feel better – I mean, there was a reason many of us had a diary when we were younger. Personally, when I write, it helps me to process and release emotions I had been holding onto , which in turn actually makes me feel lighter. The best part is – it’s completely free. I’ve handwritten my thoughts, and I’ve also drafted an email to myself.

If you aren’t much of a free writer, check out pre-populated journals with prompts like this 5-Year Journal. I actually have this exact journal, and what I like about it is that I have been able to see tremendous personal growth over the years just from one simple question per day. It gives me the confidence to see how much I have overcome and what I have been able to achieve year after year.

If writing isn’t your thing, the mere act of creative expression is healing – coloring, painting, drawing, talking, or playing music can all be equally therapeutic. See what works for you and try to integrate that a few times a week!

2. movement

When you are busy or stressed, it is likely that the last thing on your mind is exercising. But movement might be the most critical thing we can do for self-care, mental health, and physical health.

From a physical health perspective, sweating allows your body to detox and release the constant chemicals we are exposed to (see below). But from a mental health perspective, it’s one of the quickest ways I have found to refocus my energy.

Personally, on hard days, it can take a tremendous amount of effort to get out of my own head and back into reality. Movement does that for me. Instead of thinking about the pile of laundry or dozens of emails I have, I am able to focus on myself and sometimes, even take out the aggression of the day on my workout. This energy release is POWERFUL and allows me to peacefully reintegrate myself back into reality and get rid of the stagnant or unproductive emotional energy that I had been holding onto. The bonus is that my endorphins start to kick in after working out. So, not only am I lighter since I released that tension and energy in my body, but the hormones make me happier.

Of course, I’m also strengthening my cardiovascular system and my muscles which really comes in handy in my personal life. It makes chasing goats and helping my husband install kitchen cabinets way easier (and way more enjoyable) 🙂

Movement doesn’t have to be something intense like boxing, HIIT, or beast-mode strength training (although that’s what I prefer). Cycling, running, yoga, stretching, pilates, and walking are all amazing types of workouts too. Seriously, don’t underestimate the power of regular walking! Listen to your body and/or a trusted health professional to find what works best for you.

3. detox

In 2020, I received several health diagnoses after nearly a decade of mysterious symptoms (more on that in a future blog post). Thanks to my amazing functional practitioner, I learned about the “bucket” analogy, which holds true on a physical and emotional level.

The idea is that our bodies have a bucket (or limit) for how many toxins we can handle before our bucket overflows. The caveat is that we all have different-sized buckets and different-sized drainage holes, meaning your toxic load is likely way different than my toxic load. The rate at which you can release toxins is way different than the rate I can release toxins.

Toxins include tangible items such as fragrances (from candles, soaps, lotions, perfumes), chemicals we ingest in our foods, and pollution from the air we breathe. However, it also includes the non-tangible toxins we face in life such as EMFs from technology and chronic stress.

If we don’t detox, we can bioaccumulate toxicity. This is where your bucket starts to overflow and you may become sick. This happened to me. I wasn’t prioritizing my health until I was forced to.

Some of my favorite ways to detox physically can include Epsom salt baths, doing coffee enemas, getting in the sauna, cutting out processed foods, eating lots of fruits and vegetables, reducing sugar, prioritizing sleep, and drinking plenty of water.

In terms of mental detoxing, I try to put my phone on airplane mode more regularly, minimize my physical possessions, put personal boundaries up with social media use and toxic relationships, get up from my desk regularly during the workday, take an actual lunch to eat something nourishing, call a trusted friend, and my favorite, see a therapist and heal old traumas.

3. grounding

Many of us are complacent with being locked to our computer screens or devices, myself included. Work, friends, and quick entertainment are on the other side of the screen, and it’s easy to get sucked into the monotonous grind and non-stop connectedness, especially with technological advancements happening nearly every day.

But, how many times have you taken your phone away from your face or stepped away from your computer just to realize the sun is going down and you haven’t been outside all day? Back when I worked 3 jobs, that happened to me all the time. Coincidentally, I was also miserable. I was more connected than ever but felt so disconnected from reality. Technology drained me and I craved the peacefulness of the natural world around me.

The solution? Go outside and touch nature (or as my doctor would say, “hug a tree”). Grounding, also known as Earthing, is the direct contact of your skin with the surface of the Earth. This includes touching dirt, grass, concrete, trees, flowers, and sand – pretty much anything that is directly connected or rooted to the Earth.

Being in nature and connecting to Earth allows us to feel a heap of positive ions. The act of getting our feet in the grass, touching a tree, or swimming in the ocean has been proven to increase blood flow, lower inflammation, and encourage better sleep.

So, when you have the chance and when weather permits, go outside barefoot with your kids and soak up vitamin D (which has loads of mental health benefits itself), have a picnic with friends, tend to a garden, or simply touch a tree branch.

If it’s difficult to get outside regularly, or you live in a colder climate (like we do), there are indoor grounding solutions like grounding mats.

4. breathwork

When you feel overstretched, overwhelmed, or aren’t coping well with the stressors of life, one of the first areas of impact is breathing. For me, when my body gets kicked into fight or flight, I can almost immediately feel my breath becoming more shallow and rapid, which actually increases my stress levels because I feel out of control.

One of the most critical self-care practices I incorporated into my life was breathwork, and it can take many forms. Some of my favorites include:

  • Guided meditation: often integrates intentional deep breathing and relaxation techniques into each session.
  • 7:7:7: the act of inhaling, holding, and exhaling each for 7 seconds to stabilize breathing.
  • Alternate nostril breathing: alternating between inhaling and exhaling from the right and left nostril separately.
  • The Wim Hof Method: A cycle of deep breathing and holds (which can sometimes be intense). Check out some videos on YouTube.
  • Circular breathing: I often do this under the guidance of my therapist, but it is the continuous and immediate connection of the inhale and exhale. This mimicks what our bodies are trying to do during a panic attack.

Breathwork kicks my body from a state of fight or flight, into a more stable state of relaxation and control. The great thing is, most techniques can be done anywhere, and I often integrate them with other self-care practices such as grounding, sauna use, and meditation.

Self-care is a marathon, not a sprint. It is an everyday activity that we must commit to in order to move the needle towards a more balanced life.

5. say “no” more often

As a recovering people pleaser, I have had the distinct pleasure of putting others’ events, obligations, and needs before myself.

A last-minute weekend visit from friends or family? COME ON OVER!

A huge party with drinking and socializing, even though I have had an exhausting work week? SIGN ME UP!

Yeah, I don’t do that anymore. Even if you don’t have anxiety and/or suffer from panic attacks like me, you do not have to empty your tank to absolute zero. Here is your permission to disappoint others if you have to and say “no” whenever you want or need to.

It took me 31 years to learn that, and I’d like to thank my dear therapist for telling me to “lead with my heart”, meaning when someone asks you to do something, listen to yourself and honor your knee-jerk reaction. This took work. I really had to lean inward and truly listen to what my body was saying. If I felt resistance, rapid heartbeat, or a general dislike to the idea, “no” almost always followed. On the other hand, if my tank was full, I felt content, and the thought of saying “yes” energized me, then I committed.

I know this isn’t always easy or possible, but practicing with something simple can really help and give you the confidence you need to say “no” to larger, more stressful obligations.

6. grace

When I was 23 and living on my own 6 hours away from home, I remember drawing a picture of myself with like, 17 arms. I found it therapeutic to illustrate how I saw myself, which, at the time, was this lonely person trying to do a thousand things all by herself: have a clean apartment, make new friends, thrive at her new job, raise a new puppy, keep in touch with family and old friends, make enough money, pay her bills on time, and not have a mental crisis. In fact, I still have the inclination to expect this from myself. Looking back, it wasn’t fair to put that much pressure on myself to have these unrealistic standards of perfection. No one can do everything perfectly all the time.

My excuse was that I saw others on social media doing way more but THRIVING. They weren’t complaining. They weren’t struggling. They looked happy. But, as we know from social media…you never know what goes on behind closed doors. After all, we are all imperfect humans that have this modern tendency to ferociously seek out opportunities for the dopamine rush of public admiration. Don’t fall into that trap.

Instead, much like I needed to do, it’s important to have grace on yourself. We aren’t robots who can sustain high levels of energy, concentration, patience, critical thinking, and productivity – even if others expect that from you (hello, Corporate America!). We need naps. We need to disconnect from technology. We need time away sometimes, and that means from both friends and family. We need silence. We need to do nothing. Please…let yourself do nothing and don’t apologize for it. The dishes will still be there if you want to go lay on the floor alone for 30 minutes.

You Can Do It!

There is nothing more beautiful than loving and respecting yourself enough to step away and put yourself first – ironically one of the most difficult parts of self-care in the first place. With this article, my hope is that you can have more resources and methods for integrating self-care practices into your life, most of which can be weaved into your already busy lifestyle.